Often on retreat, I meet wonderful, talented and powerful women who are stuck, not willing to step forward into their potential due to the possibility of failure. It’s something we frequently discuss and as is one of the workshops I have been running in our Uluwatu retreat. Fear is something that gets everyone at some point in their lives. For many it is a daily wrestle, for others it may raise its head around perceived significant events. So much of where we go and how far we go in life and how much we are willing to risk, comes down to not only our relationship to fear but the mindset we choose to meet it with. We all share some of the most common fears – Fear of failure, fear of being enough, fear of being liked, fear of dying, fear of public speaking, the list goes on. These or a combination of these will plague the course of our lives and will stand in the way at those pivotal sliding doors moments when we are presented with opportunities. Fear is quite capable of robbing you of your dreams, often without you even realising it. But it doesn’t have to be this way. The mindset we choose is so critical and the great thing is there is a choice. If we operate from a fixed mindset, we are much less open to change and trying new things. We cling to our comfort zone, safe in the knowledge we only do things that we are good at. Thus we manage the threat of fear from our comfortable safety net. A growth mindset on the other hand, allows us to take opportunities, it says, ‘let’s try this’! We view risk as learning opportunities and try new things with the belief that it will develop us and is necessary for growth. I want to share a little story about how I came to be living this life here in Bali as it gives you a practical insight into when I have faced fear in the past and how I dealt with it. It came on the back of a huge failure. Many people assume that Bali was my plan a and it was a nice smooth road to get here. That couldn’t be further from the case. Bali was never even my plan b. In order to get here, I had to give up my childhood dream, the security of all my friends and family and a quarter of a million dollar job back home. Definitely wasn’t your typical start up founder profile. I risked all of this believing so much and being so clear on what I wanted to put out into the world and having absolute belief that because it had a place and served women like me, that it was destined for greatness. I thought Brazil would be the best place to start so I risked everything – my shares, my life savings emptying my bank accounts, selling my car, all my possessions, quit my job, all on this notion. It failed. 3 months in and I hit a wall, a huge one. I lost almost everything in the first few months and right then, in that head in hands moment when I knew it was time to pull the chord on this dream, I had a choice. I decided I wouldn’t let this failure define me and stop me doing what I know was my purpose,  rather I would take stock of the learnings and try it somewhere else (Growth mindset). So I did, I came to Bali with less than $10,000 and knew that I had the chance to start again. Without this growth mindset and the willingness to risk, this incredible dream that turned reality of Escape Haven would never have happened. I would be back where I was before but feeling defeated and would probably have never dared to have followed my dreams again safe in a fixed mindset. Luckily, I didn’t and now live the life of my dreams here in Bali and NZ with a business that has positively impacted more than 4,000 women. This demand has in turned allowed us to help the greater community here in Bali with our foundation giving education in orphanages and job creation of over 40 treasured staff in the Escape Haven Bali retreat family. This could easily have never happened if it wasn’t for that decision at my lowest point.   What I came up with was the following steps to help me release the fear  Welcome to my fear busters. 1. Don’t overthink Avoid being stuck in the cycle of ‘what if’ and analysing everything including worst case scenarios.  It’s easy to become immersed in the fear story – the perceived threat of what’s to come and worst case scenario. Whilst its good to plan for risk, by going too deep into this, your brain creates new neural pathways to reinforce repetitive thoughts and actions. If you are trapped in worry or fear-based thinking, this will stop you from moving forward. Just having the awareness that you are over-thinking your fears is enough to interrupt the cycle as does knowing that understanding your fears do NOT give you more control over them. It only further entrenches you in fear. So, stop thinking and just do, move forward One foot in front of the other. Remember done is better than perfect. 2. Be aware of fight or flight and all the physical symptoms that follow this. I always get this way before a public speaking event. Anxiety, heart palpitations, shallow, fast breathing, it makes me feel like everyone must be able to hear my heart thumping so hard in my chest. Breathe through these, you are not in threat, no one is going to eat you -you’ve got this! 3. Self belief – Fear sparks the imposter syndrome. We doubt every opportunity that is offered -do I deserve this? if I take this will I be found out? Remember your worth, you DESERVE this. 4. Be aware of dogma and don’t let others people’s fears become your own. People will often project onto you, their own fear. Be aware that these are their fears and don’t need to be your own. Fear is often a fantasy, something that doesn’t exist. 5. Break the cycle through the power of visualisation! Harness the energy you are applying to fear and shift it into a state of gratitude visually how great it already feels to have accomplished what you have. Use your power of visualtions and intention to get there. If you are a visual person, try vision boarding. For those that aren’t, journalling can really help bring to life what it is that is on the other side of fear. I did both of these things and tried to bring my dreams to life by envisaging what they smelt, felt, looked like. What often gives me goosebumps is I have almost all the things I had manifested on my vision board all those years ago. It’s all possible if you can visualise it. 6. Do a series of small things that push you out of your comfort zone. Often its hard to radically do something new if you haven’t for a long time, so build up to this. Could be small wins like learning something new (when was the last time you did something for the first time?), go to the cinema alone, go to a new fitness class. As you keep working on overcoming fear every day, you can gradually progress to bigger challenges. And one day, sooner than you think, you’ll look back on the things that used to scare the living daylights out of you, and think triumphantly to yourself: “I can’t believe I used to be scared of doing that!” 7. Realise your fears are faulty – If you think about bad outcomes or situations you feared in the past, I bet the vast majority of them never came to pass. Or if they did happen, they weren’t nearly as bad as you feared they would be. Or if you have experienced something really difficult or traumatic, your ability to cope with it and survive was far stronger and more manageable than you feared. Besides downright tragedies and awful events (which happen rarely), we aren’t handed too much in life that we can’t deal with. And when bad things do happen, we can cope with them far better with a positive outlook, than with entrenched fear-based thinking. When you train your brain to think positively and expect good outcomes, you have more energy and resiliency to handle difficult times. Like any new pattern, the key is consistently applying these practices in your life. The more often you flex these new muscles, the easier it is to apply them. Best of luck chasing your butterflies and I hope these fear busters leads you in the direction of your dreams and true purpose.